?

Log in

No account? Create an account

erasureathon

Devour

« previous entry | next entry »
Jan. 12th, 2012 | 01:04 am
posted by: woldy in erasureathon

Title: Devour
Original Text(s) Erased: The Devil He Knows
Erased By: woldy
Original Text By: atdelphi
Fandom (of original text): Sherlock
Fandom (of erasure): N/A
Notes: Um, I slipped and made an erasure? I changed the capitalization, italics, occasional punctuation, and erased parts of words in an attempt to sort out the tenses.

Far too long a silence
shifting back further into the doorway,
past midnight and pissing rain.

Paper-white skin, heavy-lashed eyes,
and lips...lips like cherries.


In a sweat, the words come strangely
"I saw the way..."

He smiles the way vampires smile,
trying to hide their fangs.
Worse: something impossible. Something alien.

Blame it on homophobic panic.

Lips on naked skin, stretched red around his cock,
then recoiling from the sudden image of needle-sharp teeth,
"Are you all right?" and run, throat tight and burning.

Never answered the question.

How does he lie to himself?
Circling the scene like a vulture,
heedless to the rain.

Impossibly pale, wide mouth, attractive,
but only human.

link | Leave a comment | Share

Comments {4}

Delphi

----

from: atdelphi
date: Jan. 12th, 2012 10:53 pm (UTC)
link

Oh. I love what you've done with this. You took a rather dry little ficlet, grabbed it by the "homophobic panic," and twisted (and I use that word with the utmost admiration) it into something gorgeous and dark and cold-sweat-arousing. I especially like how you worked with the italics, and this line: How does he lie to himself?

This is amazing, and I can't believe it came from my story!

Reply | Thread

woldy

----

from: woldy
date: Jan. 13th, 2012 02:12 am (UTC)
link

I was thinking Sherlocky thoughts after watching 2.02 and then saw your 2011 masterlist, and I loved the phrases and oral fixation theme, so this sort of happened. I wasn't sure how well it worked as a poem, but insofar as it does that's all down to your writing!

Reply | Parent | Thread

þeof in þystro

----

from: mothwing
date: Mar. 3rd, 2012 12:31 pm (UTC)
link

Beauty- and powerful, incredible work!

Reply | Thread

woldy

----

from: woldy
date: Mar. 3rd, 2012 10:15 pm (UTC)
link

I'm glad you enjoyed it, & thanks for commenting :-)

Reply | Parent | Thread